I once heard a song where all it said was “ You’re a jerk! You’re a jerk! You’re a jerk!” over and over the line repeats. Oh how I wanted to sing that to someone yesterday. Horrible of me, I know.
Today I am more hurt than anything and somehow that always seems to feel worse than just being upset. I felt like I’d gone back about 5 or 6 years and I was questioning who I was, what I was doing with my life, and wondering if there wass anything about me that’s worthwhile or that could ever impact other people for Christ. Seriously? From one comment my mind goes all the way to that thought?? I don’t know if that shows the power of words of just makes me pathetic.
I know that I am a child of the King. I am precious and loved by my Savior and nothing else, no one else, can ever take that away from me. I find peace in that truth. I wish I could say that with the peace has come joy. Not yet. With the comment came the flooding of all the things I’ve been refusing to deal with. Difficult, stressful, emotional stuff that I have gotten away with not really addressing. Apparently one more thing on top of all the stuff I’ve been suppressing was enough to “break the dam” so to speak.
On the upside Easter is probably my favorite holiday. I love remembering and praising God for the sacrifice He made so that I could live and be freed from my sin. It’s overwhelming. It’s amazing. I love every moment of the weekend from the solemnity of Christ’s death to the celebration of His resurrection. What an honor and blessing it is for us as Christians to be able to spend time really focusing on His sacrifice and giving Him the praise that He is so deserving of.
So, all that written to ultimately say that life continues to throw curveballs which seem to smack me in the face most of the time, God takes those curveballs and uses them to teach me something new about Himself and who I am in Him, and I am looking forward to a Christ-centered weekend. (During which I anticipate excessive amounts of crying).
“Blessed is the king who comes in the name of the Lord! Peace in heaven and glory in the highest!”